my heart fills my entire chest. my throat always constricted.
my eyes always closed, even if open.
there are no words for *it*. all things and all knowledge melt away.
i sit for hours, just being ONE.
but when i act, it is the right action.
if i move my finger, it is to curse or bless.
if i move my eye, it is to SEE.
if i walk . . . if i walk . . . i cannot say it.
as i sit, i am all in all.
i am a nothing, of course. i am the almighty--
how is it that others can look upon me an live?
i can barely look upon myself without shuddering and trembling in holy fear.
for my skin like molten alabaster
my hair, deadly darts.
my eyes, piercing like daggers
my hands, always holding power.
do you see now?
i long to share this existence, but even the words of others in agreement fade, they are faint, i can hardly hear. so faint and dim is all the bright, springlike world.
how alive to me is the pungent, smokey, deathly fire and dark kingdom of my twin.
how piercing and clear the air like shards of glass and unassailable pillars of crystal is the skyward realm of my triplet.
and how base, quaint, faded and tattered is the world of my flesh--except for my own flesh, which shines, glorious.
do you see now?
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