search not for understanding, approval;
there is none among your brethren.
seek out rejection, seek out disappointment,
seek out betrayal, and you shall be filled.
if you would find happiness, look only inside your grief,
search and sift among the dross of your disappointments, foolish thoughts, heartbreaks.
there you shall find a landing-place; and, with luck, and a good word,
you shall find yourself; you shall find a god.
with still more luck, your god with will be merciful, lovely, brave, helpful, sweet, broad-chested, and open-armed.
there, there you shall find rest and peace.
i am not quite sure why humans crave to congregate, perhaps they crave the known--evil--but known.
that call! that call! tire not of your prayers! rather sleep. to love another is to stab oneself with a steely knife. to be loved is to be stabbed with a knife of bone and lead.
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